Good Evening/Morning Ysrayl…

I trust all is well with you this evening/morning… … … Check it out… We gon just coast tonight… … … I’M DRAGGIN ASS TONIGHT y’all… My BODY is SORE and I’m SLEEPY DEN a MUG, so WE AIN’T gon be LONG… … … And I STARTED WRITING LATE TONIGHT… … …

NOT TOO LONG AGO I bought one of those “BOWFLEX EXTREME” home gym machines for my GARAGE, and those “SELECT WEIGHT DUMBBELLS”… I ONLY HAVE a TWO and HALF CAR GARAGE, and that WORKS BEST as far as “SPACE” is CONCERNED, as OPPOSED to a WHOLE BENCH and PLATES set up, because I got SPACE for doin other STUFF… Even though I STILL have to USE FREE WEIGHT for my LEGS… … …

Normally that WOULDN’T be ENOUGH WEIGHT with that Machine, but I’M DONE BUILKING and BEING HEAVY so what I got is PERFECT for NOW… … … RITE NOW I HOVER between 262 and 265 Pounds, and I just KEEP it TIGHT… … …

WHEN I GOT OUT of PRISON, LIKE “MOST” people that do ANY AMONUT of TIME IN PRISON, “ALLL” YOU REALLY WANNA DO is “EAT”… AND “THAT” is “EXACTLY” what I DID… … … “A LOT”… … … AND as a RESULT I GOT UP to 317 POUNDS… THAT MAY NOT SOUND “TOO RIDICULOUS” on a SIX FOOT FOUR INCH FRAME to SOME… And BECAUSE I HAVE a MUSCULAR BUILD IT HIDES PRETTY WELL, BUT “I KNEW” I WAS a “FAT BASTARD” EVEN THOUGH I HID IT WELL… And I FELT LIKE A “FAT BASTARD”… … …

I was “ALWAYS” TIRED, “ALWAYS” HUNGRY, “ALWAYS” HOT, “ALWAYS” THIRSTY, and “ALWAYS” FRUSTRATED… … … AIN’T NOTHING WORSE then WHEN YOU MAD because YOU FAT, but YOU DID it “KNOWING” YOU was gon be FAT… SO YOU JUST MAD and FAT “TOGETHER” WIT A GUILTY CONSCIENCE… … … THAT SHIT was “TERRIBLE”… … …

FUNNY STORY… WELL its KINDA FUNNY “NOW”, but at the TIME it wasn’t FUNNY… … … Some YEARS ago I LIVED in a a little town outside of MILWAUKEE… … … I was THEE ONLY BLACK MAN that LIVED in that little town… SO SHORTLY AFTER moving to that TOWN, I of course NEEDED to get myself a GYM MEMBERSHIP at the LOCAL GYM… WHO WANTS to DRIVE TWENTY FIVE MINUTES to go to the GYM, and it was 24hr GYM LITERALLY JUST OUTSIDE of the SUBDIVISION that I was LIVING IN… … … SO “I” NEED to GET a MEMBERSHIP… … …

SO I go to get JOINED and EVERYTHING… It was ONE of those PLACES that YOU NEEDED a MANAGER ON SIGHT to SIGN YOU UP… The DOOR was ALWAYS LOCKED so YOU NEEDED a “KEY CARD” to get in… So the DAY that I go to GET SIGNED UP, I walk up to the door and RING the DOORBELL so SOMEONE COULD LET ME to SEE the SITE MANAGER… … … MIND YOU, I’m “THEEE” ONLY BLACKMAN LIVING in this little TOWN, I JUST GOT THERE so “MOST” of the PEOPLE IN THAT TOWN DIDN’T EVEN KNOW I was LIVING THERE YET… And I was SIX FOUR, about TWO HUNDRED and EIGHTY-FIVE POUNDS at the TIME… MUSCLE… … … And I’m “OUTSIDE” of this GYM WITH “MOSTLY” “OLDER WHITE WOMEN” in there… THERE WERE a “FEW” OLDER WHITE MEN, but NOT MANY… … …

SO when I RANG the DOORBELL, “EVERYBODY” ACTED LIKE THEY DIDN’T HEAR IT, even THOUGH THEY LOOKED RITE AT MY BLACK ASS STANDING OUTSIDE THE DOOR… AND I “KNOW” “THEY” HEARD IT, because “I” HEARD IT, and I was “OUTSIDE”… … … MAYBE the MANAGER was JUST IN the BACK, is what I was THINKING, and MAYBE they DIDN’T HEAR it… … … SO I RANG it “AGAIN”, but this TIME I RANG it more than ONCE… … … And I’m EXPECTING to SEE SOMEONE COME FROM the BACK, or SOMETHING LIKE THAT… “NO”, the MANAGER was “RITE NEXT” to the DAMN DOOR ON a TREADMILL “LOOKING” at my BLACK ASS… … … I THOUGHT SHE was a GYM MEMBER just WORKING out… … …

So WHEN SHE REALIZED that I WASN’T GOIN AWAY she CAME to the DOOR LOOKING “EXTREMELY CONFUSED”… But SHE was VERY “PLEASANT”… And WHEN I told HER that I was THERE to SIGN UP, she WAS EXTREMELY KIND and PROFESSIONAL… I EXPLAINED to HER that I just MOVED around the WAY, so I was NEW in the AREA, and she a LOT MORE RELIEVED when SHE HEARD that I ACTUALLY LIVED THERE… Which was COMPLETELY UNDERSTANDABLE CONSIDERING “NO BLACK PEOPLE” lived there BEFORE I DID… NOT TO MY KNOWLEDGE ANYWAY… … …

So SHE SIGNED ME UP, gave me the KEY CARD, EXPLAIN what I NEED to KNOW, and EVERYTHING was SMOOTH… SHE DIDN’T GIVE me a TOUR of the GYM because I OBVIOUSLY KNEW MY WAY AROUND a GYM… So SHE WELCOMED ME and that was it… I didn’t workout “THAT DAY”, I just wanted to SIGN UP, but PLANNED to come back the “NEXT DAY” and WORKOUT… … …

SO I COME BACK the NEXT EVENING… It was a FEW PEOPLE in there, mostly OLDER WHITE WOMEN AGAIN… AND I could TELL that they were a LITTLE BIT UNCOMFORTABLE, WHICH AGAIN was UNDERSTANDABLE CONSIDERING, but NO ONE SAID or DID ANYTHING WRONG… … …

SO during this TIME I was USING “CARDIO” to MANAGE my WEIGHT, and STAY TIGHT… I DON’T USE CARDIO AT ALLL to MANAGE MY WEIGHT ANYMORE, I MANAGE MY WEIGHT THROUGH MY DIET… I HATE CARDIO NOW… … … But anyways, it was CARDIO TIME… NORMALLY I would just do some HIT TRAINING, BURPEES, SQUATS, JUMP COMBOS in a FEW SETS, and FINISH it off with a NICE RUN… But I’m in a “NEW AREA”, NOBODY KNOWS ME, so I FIGURED just JUMP on the “TREADMILL”… … …

NOW RITE HERE I NEED for Y’all to KNOW that “TREADMILLS” were an ISSUE of “CONCERN” for ME… And the REASON that they were a CONCERN, was BECAUSE I “DIDN’T” LIKE THEM… I was USED to “ALWAYS” RUNNING OUTSIDE, and TREADMILLS FELT “STUPID” to ME… I DON’T KNOW WHY, they JUST DON’T FEEL RIGHT to me… … … But NONETHELESS its CARDIO DAY and its TIME to GET IT IN… … …

SO I do my BURPEES and STUFF, and I’m TIRED as a FOOL… But “NOW” I’m BOUT to JUMP MY BIG BLACK ASS ON THIS “TREADMILL” that NOT ONLY I DON’T KNOW NOTHING ABOUT, but I DON’T LIKE BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE an IDIOT ON IT… … … SO I GET ON and FIGURED OUT HOW to TURN IT ON… BUT ONE of TWO THINGS HAPPEN that “SHOULDN’T” HAVE HAPPENED… EITHER SOMEONE “FELT” that MACHINE “PROGRAMMED”, or WHEN “I” TURNED IT ON, I “ACCIDENTLY” TURNED ON a “PROGRAM”, as OPPOSED to BEING ABLE to “CONTROL” the SPEED MYSELF… … …

SO it STARTED OFF “SLOW”, I FELT WEIRD, and IT FELT LIKE the MACHINE was TOO FRAGILE and SMALL, and that I WAS GONNA BREAK IT… So I was JUST gonna KEEP it at a SLOW JOG since it was WEIRD… … … Ok, so about 3 MINS into my JOG I heard a “BEEP”, but “I” DIDN’T TOUCH NOTHING… Now WHEN YOU HEAR “BEEPS” from a MACHINE that HAS “YOUR LIFE” in its GRASPS, AND “YOU” DIDN’T PUSH NOTHING, NATURALLY YOU GET NERVOUS RITE?… … … WELL I “DIDN’T” HAVE TIME for “ALLL” that… IT “BEEPED”, then IT TOOK OFF to LIKE ALMOST the “HIGHEST” SPEED… … …

NOW “INITIALLY” I TRIED to BE “SMOOTH” about it, but the MACHINE was GOIN WAAAY TOO FAST for ME to MAINTAIN MY “SMOOTHNESS”… I’m PUSHING STOP HARD but AIN’T NOTHING HAPPENING… I “KNOW” in my MIND, “THIS SHIT IS GOIN WAAAY TOO FAST… I’m TRYING to LOOK LIKE I “KNOW” what I’m DOIN, but I’m SCARED, and the MACHINE is GETTIN FASTER… … …

SO I FIGURE like “MOST” WOULD, let me just JUMP OFF since its “OBVIOUSLY” NOT WORKING RITE… … … “SIKE”… … … SOON as I was ABOUT to REACH MY HAND to GRAB the OTHER RAIL to JUMP OFF, “I TRIPPED”… … … THAT MACHINE THREW ME “SOOO HARD and FAST” INTO a WATER COOLER and SMALL TABLE that was SET UP BEHIND ME, I THOUGHT I WAS GOIN THROUGH “WALLS”… … … AND I TORE “ALLL” that SHIT UP… WASTED ALLL THEY WATER and SHIT… BROKE THEY LITTLE INFORMATION TABLE… “ALLL” they PAPERS was SOAKED… … … SMH… … …

MEN KNOW this PROBABLY BETTER than WOMEN… But YOU KNOW HOW WHEN YOU TRIP or SLIP and YOU JUST FAKE IT OFF like the GROUND was “UNEVEN”, and IT HAD “NOTHING” to do WITH YOUR “ACTUAL MOTOR SKILLS”… Well I COULDN’T DO THAT… And YOU KNOW HOW when YOU DO SOMETHING TRYNA BE COOL, but YOU ACCIDENTLY FU** YOURSELF UP, YOU SUPPOSED to FAKE IT OFF LIKE YOU AIN’T REALLY HURT… WELL I COULDN’T DO THAT EITHER… … .. BECAUSE I WAS “HURT FOR REAL”… … …

BUT “THEEE” WORST PART ABOUT that WHOLE SITUATION was the FACT that “ALLL” them OLDER WHITE HAD COME “HELP” MY BLACK ASS CLEAN UP ALLL THAT STUFF I JUST TORE UP… … … THE MORAL of the STORY at ALMOST 4am… TREADMILLS ARE “EVIL”… … … I DON’T KNOW WHY I NEEDED Y’all to KNOW THAT, but DON’T TRUST THEM… I NEVER WENT BACK to that GYM Y’all… … …

Tomorrow we continue our course

KING MAAZYAH

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